Chelsea Handler gives deets of her new Netflix show in a letter to herself

Are you ready for Chelsea Handler three times a week? We can hardly contain our excitement because we basically devoured those four episodes of Chelsea Does.

In a slightly NSFW Instagram of a letter to herself, Chelsea announced that we will be able to stream a new episode every Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday starting May 11. Each episode on Netflix will be half an hour, which gives you a total of 90 glorious, commercial-free, binge watching moments— if you're into that sort of thing. Will somebody please bring us our sweatpants already?

Here's the safe for work version of the announcement below:

"Dear You,

This is your new show schedule, so if you're thinking about having a baby-- DON'T. Your new show will be on every WEDNESDAY, THURSDAY, & FRIDAY on NETFLIX.

30 minutes / 3x a week / NO COMMERCIALS.

—I know it's hard for you, but waking up is a great way to start the day.

—You'll be traveling around the world and learning new things, all courtesy of NETFLIX. Treat this as an opportunity to get the college education you forgot to get.

—Sign up for Netflix.

—When interviewing respected public figures, ask yourself "What would Byron Allen do?" Then, do the opposite.

—Once an episode is up and streaming on Netflix, it will be available until the end of time, so put a little more thought into what you say this time around.

—Never give up on your dream guest list. 3. Michelle Obama 2. The Pope 1. Arnold Schwarzaneggar's (sic) maid.

—You'll be streaming in 190 countries, so remember to keep a deeper, more culturally sensitive perspective. Especially towards the Germans, they're still touchy about everything they did.

—You wanted a new show, you got it. You wanted to be on Netflix, you are. You wanted to spread your wings, now FLY (BLEEP). 
PREMIERES MAY 11th

P.S. It's an election year. Good timing, girl. 
CHELSEA"