NEWS

Families to create wave of light for lost children

Rebecca Butts
rebbutts@enquirer.com
Melissa Urbisci’s memorial at the intersection of Harrison Avenue and New Rybolt Road. Families will gather Sunday to light candles in an international wave of light in remembrance of lost children.

A wave of light will travel the world Sunday night as families light candles in remembrance of lost loved ones.

The Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting creates a 24-hour wave of light as parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters and friends light candles at 7 p.m. local time in each time zone. As candles burn out in one time zone, more are lit in the next.

The event, believed to be the largest mass candle lighting, begins in New Zealand and takes place in 16 countries.

"If you lose a child ... there is nothing to compare that can be worse than that," said Michael Urbisci. "I never expected to go to work one morning and come back and my daughter be gone."

Urbisci is the Cincinnati West chapter leader of The Compassionate Friends. The international non-profit also has Cincinnati East and North chapters. Urbisci joined the organization shortly after his 22-year-old daughter died in a car crash in 2010.

He fought to make the Green Township intersection where she died safer after discovering the intersection had a high crash rate. Now, he hopes to help other families who have lost children too soon.

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"I had no idea that the group even existed," Urbisci said. "Nobody expects to be thrown into this. It's almost like being thrown in front of a freight train."

He has participated in the candle lighting ceremony for the past five years. Families and friends who have lost loved ones are invited to gather with the West chapter at The Underground, 1140 Smiley Ave., at 7 p.m. on Sunday, Dec. 13,  to participate.

The North chapter of The Compassionate Friends is holding a candle lighting at the Gwen Mooney Funeral Home, 11285 Princeton Pike, on Sunday. Registration begins at 6:30 p.m. and there will be a pot luck after the program.

"It's basically a way to get together as a special family right before the holidays to remember our children," Urbisci said.

Many bring pictures and favorite foods of loved ones, and prepare readings to share during the ceremony. Services range in size from just a few people to nearly a thousand.

The Compassionate Friend's website will host chat room sessions and a message board for families to post tributes. There were more than 4,000 messages posted in 2014.

"It doesn't matter how you lose your child, some are health reasons, some are drug related, unfortunately some are suicide," Urbisci said. "The pain never goes away. Even though there is not a fix to it, you can go back and let other people know that it does get better. Life goes on. You have to continue but you also have to keep their memory alive."